One Shark, Jumped

Good lord, does this season suck or what? Simon's obviously counting down the days till he can get the hell out, Ryan Seacrest cant stop saying record needle scratch producing weird shit (Needlessly shitting on Brian Dunkleman while he's trying to get his glory hole business off the ground was just plain fucked up.), And Kara cant fill the shoes of a pill addict. If I hear her tell one more contestant how disappointed she is because they're missing "that swagger" I swear I will stop beating off to her in that Allure magazine spread. You think I'm bluffing, Kara?  Well roll the dice and take your chances honey. I never bluff!
Add all that to the fact that they've recruited some of the most godawful talent in the 9 seasons AI has been on the air, and you have a recipe for a real shit storm. I mean, they've got it so fucked up this year that the front runner looks like a Nashville Star reject. Yeah Bowersox is good, but do you really see anyone giving this reaction if she loses?  Yeah, it's still the most watched show in America, but deep down in places America doesn't want to talk about the feeling is that if AI was a running back it would be turning 32 and going to play for the Jets.