Okay, just one more thing

One of the things I think people are missing in this whole late night thing is why exactly people are pegging Jay as the bad guy in all of this. Sure, there's the easy answer of comparing what Jay said in 2004 with what he said to Oprah and pick out any number of lies. You could look back to how he got the job in 1992 by having his manager bury Johnny Carson with a New York Post article. But I don't think any of these obvious reasons to brand Leno are truly why he's getting pegged as the villain. I think it has more to do with Leno being a Subway sandwich.

If you hear the word Subway you automatically think of the sandwich even if you are waiting on a subway platform for an actual subway. But Subway sandwiches are just sort of there. I mean, if Subway disappeared tomorrow, would anyone give a shit? No, because all of their meats and cheeses taste the same  and their bread has never received a better adjective than "warm".

Since 1992 Jay Leno has turned the Tonight Show into a footlong Subway club. No surprises, nothing offensive, only go after the easiest of targets like OJ and Clinton,  just try to please everybody and make sure you plug all of you guest's projects, read some typos that cause sexual innuendo, say goodnight,  add pickles and olives, ask if you want a drink and chips.


Quick, the most outrageous thing to ever happen on Leno's tonight show?  Most people would say the Hugh Grant interview. But that was really just having Hugh Grant on before anyone else. And that was over 15 years ago! Anything else? Not really. Because that's how the Leno show works. The Nerf football of late night shows.

Letterman and Conan take risks. Letterman got in real spats with guests. When CBS insisted that he have reality stars from Survivor and Big Brother on The Late Show, Dave always shit on them by making them stand in the Hello Deli during the interview, making fools out of them during Top Ten lists, or making them participate in Stupid Pet Tricks.  He openly bashed Bill O'Reilly and Oprah, and called Sarah Palin's kid a whore. Conan wasn't quite as brazen as Dave, but what he lacked in grumpiness he made up for in inventiveness. Letting his writers loose, that show came up with wildly funny and popular bits like the Celebrities who only move their mouths, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, The Masturbating Bear. Sure, lots of people were turned off by both of them, but those who really identified with either show became loyal fans. Fans who swear by their guy no matter what.

Jay doesn't have those people because his milquetoast act doesn't resonate with anyone, and that's why he finds himself in the position of douchebag. Because no one really cares about him one way or another.